Think about the planet, the population explosion – and the real reasons behind your dream number, advises Mariella Frostrup
The dilemma I would really like a fourth child with my husband. We have three amazing young kids and it’s always been my dream to have four, but he has completely decided against it. I support the family financially so that isn’t the issue, but our youngest is quite a handful, which has put my husband off having another. He says we should enjoy the years ahead as the kids are entering a fun age, which I agree with. I don’t know if I should let go and be grateful – which I am already – for three healthy, happy kids. I feel like a spoilt brat for insisting on another one. Why should I get my way? But why should he get his? My childbearing years will soon be over and I’m afraid I will resent my husband. I want to avoid this, but I’m not sure I can. Should I work on convincing him and, if so, how? If I let go, how can I work through this? The emotional pain feels so strong that I don’t know how to move forward.
Mariella replies Totally understandable. Apart from anything else, if you’re nearing the end of your fertility, you’re likely to be in the grip of hormonal activity that exerts a stronger influence than rational thought. But your dilemma is also a reminder that we’re at a crisis moment. A small number of us in the western alliance have enjoyed comparatively luxurious lives since the latter part of the last century with our choices dictated only by our desires, and our ambitions by our determination to fulfil them.
Continue reading...from The Guardian http://bit.ly/2KymsjI
